Had a busy couple of weekends. We put in 14.5 foot of chain link fence for Carolina (without the Mitchells, sadly) and reassembled Big Bessie Green, the trampoline. We had all KINDS of new friends visiting our yard this weekend. I got to practice my patience and grace.

The trampoline rules:

1. Must jump with a Weems and parent supervision. (Preferably bring your own parent to watch—no, I don’t want to see you jump up and bounce on your behind for the four-hundredth time, thank you.)

2. Max four people. (Four. Period. Yes, I’m serious, four. I don’t care if your cousin Leroy once fit thirty-six fourthgraders on his trampoline. My name is not Leroy.)

3. Don’t annoy, whine, or otherwise irritate Momma Sue. THIS RULE IS VERY IMPORTANT. You have no idea how fast she can leap onto that trampoline and remove you. She will smile and speak softly, but you should be afraid—VERY afraid.

4. Oh, yes, hydrate and have fun. (But really, make sure you follow rule #3.)

Trying to decide on a caption for this photo. See which one you like best:

“How to make friends and influence people.”

“Warning: may draw trampoline vultures.”

“Wanted: trampoline monitor: inquire within.”

“May cause tropical depressions to drift into typhoons.”

If I get to take her back down for Tropical Storm Sanba this weekend, Bessie might be stuck in the shed with the spiders until typhoon season is mostly over in November. OR I will start timing my teardown and assembly time and appeal to the Olympic committee for a new event in a few years.